The reason that nothing has been done with the site since the last post is because of a number of factors. They are:

1. Me and my girlfriend finally got a house, so we've been busy making it comfortable for us.
2. I don't really have the internet on at the moment and I'm currently using my phone to tether it's data connection to let me access the net.
3. Using the WordPress app on my phone is a fucking hassle.

For those three reasons, I haven't done anything of note. WordPress on an Android phone is fucking terrible to use, especially with the way that I write and like to format my writing. It might not seem like I actually do much when it comes to writing, but I like it to appear a certain way, and I can't quite do it with the app.

Another thing is the house. Yes, we finally got a house. THANK FUCKING GOD. Well, thank the fictional character known as God, anyway.

I hope to have some sort of internet available soon, so please check back with the site. That is, if anyone actually reads this site. 2011 hasn't been a great year for me, or for the site. I wanted this year to be big for it, but that sadly didn't come about. I had big plans for a number of projects, but nothing has really gone to plan.

Fuck sticks.

Holy crap. So much random bullshit has happened to me the last few weeks since I updated the site last. I am sick of the town I live in; I am sick of the people in it; and i’m getting pissed with all of the kids.

Okay, so not all of them are pissing me off. The baby actually behaves unlike the rest of them. The oldest one is consistently a fucking asshole to me and his mother. And the twins… well, whilst they aren’t as bad as him, they have their moments.

The twins biological mother is being a cunt again. And once more, it all harkens back to the house she let become all fucked. I found out that for the two years (almost three) since she was kicked out of the house, the reason I haven’t been able to get a house is because of her leaving a massive phone bill from the house in my name.

The bill was in my name originally and I left it on because she is hopeless and couldn’t get a phone put on because she had a previous bill that fucked her credit.

I’m pissed off. Fuck this, post over.

Okay, so I find alot of bad porn. And sadly, I do not post all of the worst porn I find here because some of it is just too sad to actually post.

So here is a supplement to those posts, essentially just the worst things I find in my general browsing of the internet. Part one?

Holy shit… I remember seeing or hearing this when it first came out and I hated it from the very beginning. This thing is fucking annoying so much that I highly doubt many people remember this song.

Remember how fucking popular that dancing baby thing got back in the late 90's? That shit was fucking ridiculous!

Also… how dare they destroy something as classic as 'Hooked On A Feeling'!

I was traversing the internet when I stumbled upon the news that Chyna of WWF fame has made a new porno. And when I say new porno, I say first porno, because a sex tape with a midget like X-Pac does not constitute a porno.

You can probably guess where I am going here. Check it out after the NSFW jump. Read More?

I have not had the internet for a number of weeks because the phone had been cut off due to the phone company being douchebags. In this time, i've missed a number of things such as every episode of this season's Doctor Who, the remaining episodes of Stargate Universe, Osama Bin Laden being killed (I found out three days after… three days!) and finally, the recent announcement that DC Comics are rebooting their universe.

What the fuck has happened during my time off the net? Rebooting their comics back to all #1 is insane. Action Comics #1, Detective Comics #1, Green Lantern #1… everything… #1!

Arrgggghhhh! I have not been a fan of the DC universe for almost my entire life for them to abandon their heritage. Fuck that! FUCK THAT! And my god, their new costumes are terrible! Fairwell DC, it was good knowing you!

I'm surprised to find that Earth hasn't been invaded by fucking martians, considering how topsy turvy the world has fucking become.

I wasn't even looking for bad porn today… I was looking for good porn. The type of porn that makes you feel funny in the nether-regions of your body.

And… oh god, this is NSFW and it is probably not safe for your eyes… or brains. It is just a single photo montage, and it is after the jump.

Read More?

I'm currently sitting at a computer in the middle of Penrith Plaza. I am fucking bored, andI waiting for Matty to come and pick me up after dropping his kids at their mothers. I myself have onlyjust finished upon the train, after dropping the kids off with their mother's boyfriend.

I am fucking tired, bored and sightly annoyed that this keyboard is really fucking sticky. Seriously, every key seems to either stick when pushed in, or it doesn't want to be pushed in.

Haven't been motivated to do anything with this site recently. If you have been checking my Twitter however, you might have seen that I have added some toy reviews that I've begun doing over at blip.tv.

The "show" is called Cheap Toys Review, and I take a look at various budget toys I come across at some of the discount stores in my town, or elsewhere. In fact, after my time runs out at this computer terminal, I might go and take a look at one  of the cheap shops here.

So keep an eye out there, because I will be adding a new episode every week… hopefully every Saturday, schedule permitting.

You can follow the show via the show page at blip, or via the website i'm currently working on for it at the Patten Project.

I just came across what I will now claim is the greatest commercial ever! If I am claiming this commercial to be the greatest ever, then you just know it has something to do with the Mega Shark series!

Is there anything that you cannot do with this series? It is pure excellence, dissolved down to it's most pure essence.